Firestar Escapes

Yesterday, Firestar left the apartment on his own. I was bringing Son back from school and Spouse opened the door for us. That was the moment Firestar had been waiting for. He dashed around feet and into the hall. I saw him slip by and turned to go after him.

No need. By the time I had even turned to see how far he had run he was stopping and dropping low. Apparently, the long hallway was an entirely unexpected occurrence. He wasn't sure what to make of it, but he was sure he didn't like it. He turned and slinked back into the apartment and jumped on the office chair next to mine. I came in and sniffed noses.

He probably won't be doing that again. At least, not for a while. But some of his curiosity about what draws people out that door has been resolved. He must think we're nuts. What could we possibly be doing out there in that long hallway?

I ask myself the same question every time I walk it.
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Don't Talk With Your Mouth Full

It has taken weeks, even months, to get this picture, and I didn't even get a good one. Had to snap it quickly, before the moment was lost.

I think Firestar gets nostalgic at times. I will hear him cry - almost whimper. Then, he will show up with his favorite toy in his mouth, as though wanting someone to throw it. Back when he was a kitten, he and Son would play catch for long periods. Son would toss the toy across the room and Firestar would chase it, sometimes catching it in the air. Then he would bring it back to repeat the process.

He will still chase the toy - sometimes. But never catches it and never, ever brings it back anymore. But every so often - particularly if someone has just left the house - he will carry his toy around the house and cry. I've tried several times to get a picture of it, but once he sees me he drops the toy, and it will be days before he picks it up again. Yesterday, right after Spouse left for work, he brought his toy downstairs. He got distracted by movement outside the dining room door and that gave me time to get the camera. Didn't have time to wait for it to focus. He was realizing I saw him and I had to snap the picture. This is what I got.

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Never Make a Cat Jealous

Firestar did something interesting yesterday. Well, he usually does interesting things. It's just that, often, one must be a cat to find them interesting. Staring, for instance. He likes to do that. I think he gets a kick out of us trying to figure out what he's thinking. Sometimes it's evident: he wants to bite something - someone. Sometimes it's also evident: he thinks were nuts. Most of the time it's a bit disconcerting.

Anyway, Son came and told me this. He found it amusing and I thought I would pass it on.

In typical fashion, Firestar decided to sucker punch Son while Son was watching television. This is one of Firestar's favorite games. It usually happens after staring for five or ten minutes. Firestar will rush foreward, whop (or bite) Son and then take off. This time Son made pursuit.

He found Firestar in his room, sitting on the bed. Son, deciding to "rub Firestar's nose", so to speak, picked up several plush animals and hugged them closely, telling Firestar how soft they were, and how cuddly, and how much he loved them. Finished, he arranged the plush animals on his bed and left. Before he did, though, he turned around to see what Firestar was doing. (It's never safe to turn your back on him for long.)

Within the span of a few seconds Firestar had ravaged the stuffed animals and was calmly walking away as though he hadn't done it. He came to me, all innocent, seeking a back rub. Son followed and ratted him out. He's going to get you for that, Son. Oh. I suppose he's going to get me, too. I posted it on the blog.

Oops.
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Showing Off

We took down Son's bed today. He outgrew it years ago, but we couldn't afford to buy him a new one. Now we're selling the frame and he'll have to sleep on the floor like Spouse and me.

Anyway, Firestar was curious about the activity and decided to demonstrate his skills. He has a fine sense of balance, even if he doesn't have much other sense sometimes.


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Kitchen Cupboards and Drawers

Firestar can open kitchen drawers. Not the small ones just below the counter surface, but the big drawers closer to the floor.

He taught himself to do this after teaching himself how to open the cupboard doors. Spouse used to keep his food there. After he was able to open cupboards Spouse put his food in one of the big drawers. After he was able to open that the food went into the laundry room. He's working on opening door with a handle, but he's not quite tall enough. What he needs is a step stool or something. God help us if he figures that out.

Although his food is no longer in the big drawer he will still open it up on occasion to look inside. It's where we now keep cookie sheets, pizza pans, and things like that. He sees me use the drawer often enough that he wants to make sure about what's in there, I guess.

The other day Spouse was at the sink and I was at my computer station. From my computer station I see all of the kitchen. The kitchen is about two-and-a-half feet higher than the family room, where my computer station is, and all that separates the two rooms is a wooden rail.

Anyway, Firestar goes to the big drawer and begins working it open. Takes him about a minute. He jumps inside to make sure all of the pans have to be rewashed. Then he hops out and walks over to Spouse as if to point out the fact that there isn't anything of value in the drawer.

Spouse talks to him, bragging him up for being so clever about opening the door. He struts and purrs. Then Spouse looks at the drawer.

"Hey! You left it open. Close it when you're done."

Firestar immediately responds with his angry meow.

They don't take orders, you know.
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Kennel Cab

Back in January, when we nearly lost Firestar to a severe illness, we transported him in his Kennel Cab. For some time afterward he associated the Kennel Cab with going to the vet, being poked and prodded, being forced to wear a catheter, and a host of unhappy feelings.

He would run away at the sight of it.

The weather is nice now, and we have been spending a lot of time out in the garage preparing for the sale. Firestar hasn't liked it that we have been outside while he has to stay in, so he has taken to letting us know his feelings with an assortment of vocal messages.

This neighborhood is not especially safe for him, especially since we foolishly had one of his primary defense tools taken from him. Firestar is declawed on his front paws. So we don't let him run free outside. But he wants to be there. So we made up a compromise. Firestar can come outside with us - providing he remains in the Kennel Cab.

The first time we did this he wasn't keen on it (actually, the first time he never made it because he saw the Kennel Cab and ran away) and we brought him back in right off. But it didn't take him long to realize that the Kennel Cab was his ticket to the garage. Now, not only does he not mind being in it, but he will go inside it even when we are all in the house. In fact, it has become his way of telling us he wants to go outside. A very nice arrangement. Very quiet.

Cats are clever things, aren't they?


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Comprehension Without Speaking the Language

Every day I become more and more convinced Firestar has a complete grasp of the English language. Time and again he will sit, or lay, quietly while I talk to him. Then I'll say something he disagrees with and he'll correct my thinking. It happened again yesterday.

Spouse and I were in the garage pricing items for our garage sale. Firestar was whining about being left in the house so we brought him out. Now unlike other cats, Firestar is not allowed to roam free through the neighborhood. The number of dogs around here has increased exponentially, and they all hate cats. And there are no trees to climb, so Firestar would be in a constant state of attack. Therefore, when he goes outside he has to be in his carry case. It's not his first choice, but he likes being out of the house. I think he feels he's closer to the birds.

Actually, I will, on occasion, let him roam free in the yard. Just not for long.

Anyway, Spouse and I were talking, discussing pricing agreements and such. Spouse keeps pricing her items at $5 and mine at $0.25. Son gets a compromise. His stuff is priced at $1. While this 'debate' rages, Firestar goes quiet in his box. Then, Spouse makes this comment.

I guess he's asleep now. I don't hear anything.

Immediately - and I mean immediately - Firestar meows.

Later, he and I were in the house while Spouse was in the garage. He stood by the door demanding to be let out. Finally, I told him he was being annoying. He denied it. I assured him he was. So he comes over to me to rest on my shoulder and purr. He returned to the door and repeated his demand, only softer. I told him it was still annoying and that if he didn't knock it off I was going to put him down in the office. He quit.

He's been by three times already this morning, each time wanting to be on my shoulder. Normally he only does that once. I assured him I don't find him annoying at all.
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Chain Yanker

Firestar has been around three times already this morning. He had been down on the fourth level looking out the walkout door. Rabbits like to graze across our lawn just before dawn. Then, when the sun wakes up, various birds have their walkthrough.

But some mornings he will come quietly up the steps and over to where I sit in front of the computer. I learn he is there when he rubs against my legs. Other times he stands in the dining room, which is about three feet higher than the family room where I am, waiting for me to see him. Once I do he comes down the four steps so I can rub his back, beginning at the ears. I put one finger on either side of his head and slowly scratch backward toward his tail.

When he's feeling especially friendly, like this morning, he will put his front paws up on my hip. This is his signal for me to pick him up. I cuddle him up in my arms and he purrs while I lift him to my head. Then, cat-like, I rub my forehead against him. I try to communicate with him using the same methods he uses with me. Doesn't always work. I'm not that familiar with the language. But he shows little interest in learning mine.

Son has taken to doing some of the things, too. Spouse, on the other hand, does not. Spouse insists Firestar learn and understand our language. So when he gets in one of his aggressive moods, it becomes an endless barrage of, "No! Bad! Stop that! I said no!" It goes on ad nauseum. Spouse tells Firestar to knock it off, and he gives a right cross. Spouse tells Firestar he's bad and it's a left jab. Sometimes he bites.

I don't do that. I hiss. I can make him stop doing something without hardly moving a muscle. He can be on the other side of the house. If I see him doing something he's not supposed to do I just hiss and he stops. Sometimes, if he doesn't think he was violating any rule, he will meow at me. Other times (and this is so cute) he will half run away, meowing as he goes. The effect is a kind of vibrating meow which sounds absoulutely pitiful. This usually happens when he is interfering with a print job. He loves to play with the printer.

Firestar is amazing. He has the power to make me feel so loved and wanted. Then, just a few minutes later, he will show me equally how I am about the most useless piece of sh*t in the place. I couldn't get him to come near me if I opened a can of tuna. (I know. I've tried this.) And there doesn't appear to be much of a rhyme or reason for it. It's whatever his mood is.

He knows he has the power, and sometimes he just likes to use it. He's a chain yanker. That's what he is.
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A Cat's Pornography

So I've always wondered about Firestar, and now I know. He's a bit of a pervert.

The other day Spouse and Son were playing cards in the living room. They called me to come and see what Firestar was doing. He was at the window, very interested in some mating activity going on with some ducks. Now true, the ducks should have booked a room. There's a hotel just under two miles from here. Very nice. Pool and everything. They were doing a threesome, you know.

I suppose he has to get his jollies somehow. We don't have any x-rated films about the house. Nor do we get the dirty magazines. So this was probably quite the spectacle.

By the time I could get back with the camera the ducks had left and Firestar's intense posture had settled into something more relaxed. All he needed was a cigarette. But we don't have those in the house either.

What? I'm not doing nuthin'.

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Some Basic Rules We're All Aware Of

Good morning, fellow Alley Cats. Have you got a house to run? Well, I found a web site with a few tips. Nothing really new. Just common sense stuff.

If you have to throw up, get into a chair or on the bed quickly. If you cannot manage in time, get on an Oriental rug. If no Oriental rug is available, shag is good. When throwing up on the carpet, make sure you back up so that it is as long as the human's bare foot.

Do not allow closed doors in any room. To get door opened, stand on hind legs and hammer with forepaws. If this does not work, reach under the door pulling it towards you. Should this fail, stand at the door and scream until one of your humans responds. Once the door is opened, it is not necessary to use it.

After you have ordered an outside door open, stand halfway in and out and think about several things. This is particularly important during very cold or very hot weather, rain, snow, and mosquito season. Swinging doors are to be avoided at all costs.

Quickly determine which guest has allergies or hates cats the most. Sit on that lap. If you can arrange to have "fish 'n Glop" on your breath, so much the better. For a guest who claims, "I love kitties," be ready with aloof and disdain.

Always accompany any guest to the bathroom. It is not necessary to do anything ... just sit and stare.......

If one of your humans is engaged in some close activity and the other is idle, stay with the busy one. This is called helping, otherwise known as hampering.

Following are the rules for hampering:

• When supervising cooking, sit just behind the left heel of the cook. You cannot be seen and thereby stand a better chance of being stepped on and then picked up and comforted.


• For book readers, get in close under the chin, between eyes and book, unless you can lie across the book itself.


• For knitting projects or paperwork, lie on the work in the most appropriate manner so as to obscure as much of the work or at least the most important part. Pretend to doze, but every so often reach out and slap the pencil or knitting needles.


• When a human is holding the newspaper in front of him/her, be sure to jump on the back of the paper. They love to jump.

Any small item is a potential toy. If a human tries to confiscate it, this means that it is a Good Toy. Run with it under the bed. Look suitably outraged when the human grabs you and takes it away.

Always watch where it is put so you can steal it later.

As mentioned above, in order to have enough energy for playing, a cat must get plenty of sleep. It is generally not difficult to find a comfortable place to curl up. Any place a human likes to sit is good, especially if it contrasts with your fur color.

There's a lot more. I just took some of the high-lights.

Feel free to offer your own.
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Excerpts From Firestar's Day

You know, Bevie, you really should clean your closet.

It was fun getting up here. Now how in the h*ll am I going to get down?

This may work.

Bevie, that had better be clothes in the basket down there.

Ah, my new toy!

Pity about the old one. Chewed the stuffing out of that one.

Literally.

Didn't think I'd like this one. Spraying it with catnip sure helped.

Like, wow, man!

Rats!

Do I really feel like bringing it back up here?

Laundry day.

One of life's simple pleasures.

Rolling in a scented dryer sheet.

Now I'll smell clean and fresh.

Uh, not that I ever don't. purrrrrr


Heck of a day.

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A Cute Cat Story

I wasn't going to post this, but something about it just made me laugh and smile. Found it at this site.

Fly-strips are very sticky
An e-mail from cat Gina to tomcat Jonas.

"Boootiful !!!!!!!!" :o)))))))))

Sorry that I take the Mickey, Jonas, but we rarely see such a brush :o)

By the way, you have a partner in the suffering, and that is ME!

Some weeks ago I got stuck with my tummy to a fly- strip which had been attached to the kitchen cupboard. When I tried to get rid of the damn thing I got more and more entangled :o(

My Missus saw this and tried to help by pulling the fly-strip out of my fur - of course it did not work!

After a seemingly never ending time and plenty of the disgusting hot water the
terrible thing had disappeared out of my fur, but some of the glue wouldn't come out.

So my Missus got out the scissors, and ...do I have to say more? Absolute disgusting,
I looked like a plucked chicken. Meouw !!!

But now for the icing of the cake as they say: The girlfriend of my Missus came to visit us, and she greeted me with gusto. She loves me very much, I don't know why. Then she noticed the bare spots on my behind and asked for the reason of my disfigurement. My Missus told her about my mishap, and she wanted to show her friend another spot where some of my fur had been cut off. She lifted me up, so the friend could look under my tummy. She lifted me higher, and higher, and then it happened! She pushed me on to another fly-strip which was hanging from the ceiling, she had overlooked this one, and now I was wrapped up again! Heeeeelp !!!!!!

Once more the scissors came out and I lost my newly grown hair again.

Well, don't YOU talk about embarrassment, I presented a much worse sight.

By now I am as beautiful as ever, yeah.

All my love

--->> GINA <<--- (one of Eki's cats).
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A Happy Cat Film

This was hysterical!



Looks like I need to get Firestar a companion.

Oh, by the way. It kind of looks like someone may have hijacked Firestar's account. He's going to have to post through me for a bit now.
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Cats Make Good Buddies

So, I had to run a new scan of my computer this morning. Downloaded SpyBot's SpotZilla software. It found 44 instances of spyware and other malicious things. The worst came from our MixCraft music software which Son uses to create wonderful music. (In order to remove all of these things I had to pay $10. Didn't like doing it, but I didn't like having the junk either. So now we're "protected" for a year. Right. Thought my current security software was supposed to protect us.)

Anyway, Firestar loves to watch the computer screen. I find this interesting because he shows no interest for the television screen. He'll occassionally look at it, if an unusual sound is made, but otherwise he ignores it. The computer, however, seems to fascinate him to no end. I suppose it's because the computer monitor virtually never shows people. I don't know.

I do know he spent about an hour with me this morning watching. Then we both got tired of watching the screen and left.

Firestar has the most wonderfully expressive face. Sometimes it's wonderfully inexpressive. Those are the times he just sits across the room and picks someone to stare at. It can be most disconcerting sometimes.

This morning I need to clear out my throat. So I got a drink of water and gargle. I turned and saw Firestar staring at me with one of those, "Just what the h*ll do you think you're doing", looks.

He's been my buddy lately. Not sure why. But he will come and walk across my chest, rub my face with his (I do this to him, too), then settle down in the crook of my arm. Should I get up and move to another room, often he will follow. So I've taken to letting him know if I plan on returning soon, or inviting him to come along if not. Right now he's in the rocker just behind me.

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Hey, I Can Write, Too

Why is it that humans think they are so special? They do something silly and useless, and suddenly they think they have value. When are they going to learn that their value is entirely dependent on how we happen to view them at any given moment in time?

Take today. I had to punish Spouse and Son this afternoon. They were in the study going through some of Son's things, putting them into boxes. Now Son probably has the best things of the three of them, although I like watching Bevie in front of the kumputer thing. All of that movement. Can't catch anything, though. I've tried.

Anyway, I figured this was a good opportunity to explore the room and play with some of those cheweable things. Normally, I can't get in there. Well, I'm hardly in there any time at all and Son whacks me on the head. And Spouse blames me! Son claimed it was an accident, but humans are not allowed. Well, there was only one response. I had to walk to the door and sit with my back to them. Bevie saw me. Asked me what was up. Upon Son's confession, Bevie congratulated me on my firm paw and walked away. Bevie knew better than to interfere in a disciplinary action.

But humans are so silly. Bevie writes and thinks that's some kind of a big deal. Well, meow, meow, meow. I can write, too. And to prove it, here is a poem I wrote just today. I call it, Why Did God Make People?

Why Did God Make People
by Firestar

So why did God make people?

It’s my understanding he made them last.

That means he made them after cats.

But from a different mold he cast.

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People aren’t like house cats.

They aren’t like wild cats, too.

In fact, they aren’t like anything.

Except, perhaps, baboons.

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They’re noisy and they’re smelly.

And they can’t catch things like mice.

They aren’t much good at anything.

‘Cept feeding, which is nice.

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I keep three humans here with me.

I try to keep them trained.

But training humans is a full-time job.

My patience oft is strained.

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But their bodies do have warmth.

And their hands can be so tender.

So laying on their laps,

Is the way to spend a winter.

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So, take that, Bevie! Mrrrooowwwllll

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Cat Instincts

Here's another submission from Rufus and his slave, FairyHedgeHog. Here we see a cat's mothering instinct in action. Very nice. It's a darling video.

Funny Looking Kitten
Uploaded by funnytoo

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Spring is Open Windows - And Insanity

So, it's promising to be a beautiful day. Already above freezing, and no wind to speak of. So I opened the front door and put a folding chair by it so Firestar could sit and look out while breathing in the wonderfully fresh spring air. This induced a not unfamiliar behavior from Firestar.



After taking in a few breaths Firestar began his frenzied racing through the house. It's a wonder he doesn't crash into things. He moves so fast that by the time you look to see him he has already moved on to another room.



He doesn't want outside, but he seems to react to fresh air like it were some kind of drug. Wish I had that kind of energy. I could power the house.


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The Right Job for the Right Pay

Here's another cute item, courtesy of FairyHedgeHog. She found it on the Futility Closet.

At the Kishi railway station in southern Japan, the stationmaster has her own litter box. Tama, a local stray cat, was named to the post in January 2007, and ridership immediately jumped 17 percent.

She's paid in cat food and gets her own hat; as the station is unmanned, her main job is to greet passengers.

This all sounds remarkably progressive, but Tama may have mixed feelings: She's still the only female manager in the company.

(Image: Wikimedia Commons)

Now that's a job I could do.
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Just What am I Supposed to do With This

We haven't had a cat video in a bit. Found this one.



You gotta love cats.
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With God All Things Are Possible

I came across this story this morning. It's supposed to be true. Found it at this site. But whether it is true or not, it is a great story.

The Cat

Dwight Nelson recently told a true story about the pastor of his church.

He had a kitten that climbed up a tree in his backyard and then was afraid to come down. The pastor coaxed, offered warm milk, etc. The kitty would not come down. The tree was not sturdy enough to climb, so the pastor decided that if he tied a rope to his car and drove away so that the tree bent down, he could then reach up and get the kitten. He did all this, checking his progress in the car frequently, then figured if he went just a little bit further, the tree would be bent sufficiently for him to reach the kitten. But as he moved a little further forward, the rope broke. The tree went "boing!" and the kitten instantly sailed through the air - out of sight.

The pastor felt terrible. He walked all over the neighborhood asking people if they'd seen a little kitten. No. Nobody had seen a stray kitten. So he prayed, "Lord, I just commit this kitten to your keeping," and went on about his business. A few days later he was at the grocery store and met one of his church members. He happened to look into her shopping cart and was amazed to see cat food. Now this woman was a cat hater and everyone knew it, so he asked her, "Why are you buying cat food when you hate cats so much?" She replied, "You won't believe this," and told him how her little girl had been begging her for a cat, but she kept refusing. Then a few days before, the child had begged again, so the Mom finally told her little girl, "Well if God gives you a cat, I'll let you keep it?" (Can you see where this is heading?)

She told the pastor, "I watched my child go out in the yard, get on her knees, and ask God for a cat. And really, Pastor, you won't believe this, but I saw it with my own eyes. A kitten suddenly came flying out of the blue sky, with its paws outspread, and landed right in front of her." Never underestimate the Power of God and what may appear to be breaking on one end, is answering prayer on another.

http://www.mountainwings.com
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