Saturday, January 10, 2009

A Proposal to the Feline Masters of the Internet

Okay, you cats. Here's the deal.

Rufus told me about Geoff, and how hot she is. His slave (peon is my name for 'em) provided contact information and Bevie set out to find her. Well, she posted back yesterday (way to go, Bevie, you did something right for a change - now pick me some catnip and rub my feet) and confirmed her hot status. I suggested she might submit herself to be Kitten of the Month.

The more I think of it, the more I like the idea. So how's about we do that? Here are the options I've come up with. Tell me what you think.

Kitten of the Month:
1) Female cats only (kind of sexist, don't you think)
2) Female or Male cats (I lean toward this one because I'm a sexy, rough and tough cat)
3) Female and Male cats (one for each - would this diminish the crown?)

Submissions could be made either by emailing them to me (, or by posting a picture on your blog and submitting the LINK. Some sort of bio should accompany the picture. What would make a good maximum words: 100-, 200-, 300-?

Currently, only three ( 3 ) cats have walked this alley: Myself, Rufus and Geoff. That means we should all have a vote for the January winner (assuming you cats want to do this).

You cats have any thoughts?


Rufus said...

No worries, Firestar. I can be cat of the month every month, I'm that hot.

Firestar said...

I take it you like the idea?


So, what other cats do we know in this cyber world? I've walked with Bevie sometimes. It seems to me some of those bloggers report to cats. Maybe I should take a stroll down those other alleys and send out some "markers" of my own?

talpianna said...

What will the criteria of choice be? If it's just good looks, I'm sure my sister Sethra the Fluffy Bimbo will win easily (at least when she's not wearing her beard for her role as the Mad Monk Rasputin). If it's brains and malevolence, I'm your pussycat!

What about alternating, having a male Kitten of the Month followed by a female one?

Is this going to be a formal contest, with evening gown, bathing suit, and talent competitions? Will we have to write an essay about how we will bring peace and prosperity to the world (for cats, of course--humans can continue mucking things up)?

You might want to take a look at my human's blog, FluffyCatBabylon. Her ideas about "rules" (HAH!) for cats are absurd, of course, but her plans for a Cat Olympics aren't half bad.

--Aliera of the Many, Many Sharp White Teeth

Firestar said...

Hi, Aliera!

Criteria will be determined by us cats here on this blog. I wasn't thinking it should be too strenuous. Even tough cats like to take it cool.

Maybe we could base it on how well we have trained our slaves/peons? It could be part of the text with the photo.

Cat Olympics, huh? I'm going to have stroll over that way and have a look see.

Alternating? I have no problem with that.

Aliera? Female?

talpianna said...

Yes, I'm a girl. My half-sister Sethra and I (we're half meezer and half passing stranger) are named for charactes in Steven Brust's Dragaera fantasy novels. (Since the author is of Hungarian origin, the names probably are too. If you saw VAN HELSING, and noticed anything but Hugh Jackman's bare chest, you might have noted that Dracula's chief bride was called "Aleera.")

I know a hot guy, the Hugh Jackman of cats. He lives in London and is the timeshare pet of an archaeologist known as The Silver Tigress.


Firestar said...

Oh, my!!!!

Just took a look at the link.

Meeooowww! That's a good pin-up.

I'd better not let Bevie see that. Bevie absolutely drools over good-looking cats.

Your name may have a meaning like "high, sublime". If so, then you have an excellent cat name.

Sethra was harder. Could mean "appointed". Also a good cat name.

Have your sister sign in and I'll add her to the Alley Cat Walk.

BBJD said...

Hello, Talpianna. Bevie here.

I just read through your Cat Olympics schedule.

Love the yowling to go out/come in. Why'd you leave off Yowling Just Because?

My favorite is Staring out window at nothing in particular.

I spoke with Spouse and Son. Son was thinking along the same lines as your olympics. Spouse suggested we just appoint winners in the order they enter the Alley Cat Walk.

Anyone have any thoughts?

Music to Make the Cats go Wild

Just a love song.

Musical Cats

Our Theme Song

Kitten of the Month - August

Kitten of the Month - August
Tara - Nick name 'ity-bit' because she's so tiny - just over 6 pounds. She's the most skittish of all my babies and even when being petted has the 'pet me, no don't pet me' look

Kitten of the Month - July

Kitten of the Month - July
Amelia - Nickname 'Bratelia' since she gets into every draw, cabinet that she can put her paws in.

Kitten of the Month - June

Kitten of the Month - June

“She’s got tuna. I know she’s got tuna.”

“Shut up, Sethra. Stay on mission.”

“What’s the mission? I thought the mission was to get tuna.”

“No, you stupid fluffbrain—it’s to escape and become outdoor cats, walking by ourselves, on our wild lone, waving our tails.”

“Oh, yeah? And isn’t it you, my dear stripy sister Aliera, who keeps pushing the FEED button on the printer and waiting for tuna to come out?”

“That was when I was much younger. Anyway, she’s at the computer—yes, eating tuna casserole—so we can go into the bedroom and see if we can knock the window screen out.”
“You do it, Aliera. I’d rather mess with her stuff.”

“Will you GET OVER that fixation on her wristwatch?”

“I like the feel of the Velcro on my paws. Hey! That reminds me. We’ve been declawed. How are we going to survive as outdoor cats?”

“New plan coming up….”

“What’s the big deal about being outside cats? Even StalkerCat, who used to hang around and chat us up, is a house cat now and loving it. We’ve got it made—food, petting, toys, valet service for the litter box, and we get to sleep on her bed twenty hours a day. And we can stick our noses up to the window and smell anything interesting going on outside. Why ruin a perfect situation?”

“Sethra, have you no sense of adventure? No curiosity? No cattitude? We were meant to live wild and free, to stalk and slay our prey, to be mistresses of the night!”

“Look, we’re cats. We were meant to rule the world, but that doesn’t mean we have to WORK at it. You can if you want, but I don’t need to. After all, I’M beautiful!

“Did I mention she’s got tuna?”

Kitten of the Month: May

Kitten of the Month: May
Kitten Close-Up.

Kitten of the Month: April

Kitten of the Month: April
At 8, you'd think Mikey would understand that he's a carnivore. But, no, he's rather fond of the shrubbery! At 20+ pounds, the veggie-enhanced diet is likely mitigated by a love for long naps on a warm comforter, wet cat food, begging at the table, and a nice lap to drape himself upon in the evening. And he drools when he's happy, which may or may not mean there's a Siamese ancestor lurking in the old dna.

What? Green teeth attract mice!

Kitten of the Month: March

Kitten of the Month: March
Who needs a wickerwork basket when you can hop on a cushion and bask?

Kitten of the Month: February

Kitten of the Month: February
Rufus is clearly a cat to be reckoned with.

Kitten of the Month: January

Kitten of the Month: January
Firestar is a tough cat. He has to be, living in Minnesota. He takes care of his family: wife, husband and their son. This was recently proven by his daring capture of yet another mouse in the house. Foolish rodents. They never learn. When not engaged in derring do, Firestar naps, looks out the window and sleeps. Firestar was born in April of 2006.