People Think They Know Us - But They Don't

While traveling through the cyber streets with Bevie this morning we came across this site which purports to answer some of the questions of cat behavior. They haven't a clue.

Here are the ten questions they think they answered, and the ten real answers to those questions.

1. Why do cats knead humans with their paws?

According to the site, it's because we like humans. But they left out the two important words. We knead humans because we like to kill humans. Simple explanations are always best.

2. Why do cats dunk their toys in the food and/or water bowls?

According to the site, its because we're trying to protect our toys. The real answer is we do it because it's annoying to humans.

3. Why do cats chatter at birds outside or on television?

According to the site, it's because we're frustrated. Before I give you the real answer, let me make one thing clear: Cats.Don't.Chatter. Now, to the explanation. It's the same as when humans talk to their car, television, telephone or any other contraption. No big deal.

4. Why do cats attack my feet (human asking question) when I walk by?

According to the site, it's because we're playing. The real answer is because the jugular is too high to bother with.

5. Why do cats like to drink water from a running faucet?

According to the site, it's because we like the taste and the motion. The real answer is because you can't drink water from a tap which is shut off! Duh!

6. Why do cats go crazy at night?

According to the site, it's because we sleep during the day and are active at night. Well, I've got news for them. We sleep during the night, too. However, we learn to be most active in direct proportion to the amount of annoyance we can cause with our activity. People who work during the night find their cats go crazy during the daytime. purrrrrr

7. Why do cats knock things over?

According to the site, it's not because we're clumsy. We just want to get human attention - or we think it's funny. Okay. I'll give them the "we think it's funny" bit. One out of seven.

8. Why do cats rub their heads on our legs and shoes?

According to the site, it's because we're "marking" the human as our own. The real answer is we only do it when humans don't want us to, therefore making it an annoying act.

9. Why do cats suddenly hiss and bite when being petted?

According to the site, it's because we're letting the human know the petting session is over. The real answer is we do it because biting humans is funny. It's especially funny when they don't see any reason for it. Keep 'em guessing. That's what we do.

10. Why do cats scratch on glass windows?

According to the site, it's because we're testing the glass to see if we can get through it. What rubbish! Of course we know we can't get through it. We touch the glass because it's just been cleaned. We've even been known to lick the glass in order to get it wet enough to attach our loose hairs as we rub on by. People, people, people. Learn about cats!

They really don't know us, do they?
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